For a long time, I missed U. U were the perfect companion for so many years – the yin to my yan, the in to my out, the quenching water to my insatiable thirst. The one who showed me the real meaning of life. Before I found U, I didn't have a clue what I was missing.
I can honestly say that no one has ever known me so intimately and no one ever will. No one has been with me through thick and thin – not like U. U were perfect to bounce things off of. Always reliable and rarely complained – in the beginning. And it wasn't just me. Truly, U carried the load for so many. I confess, I let U put yourself in the line of fire for me and "take one for the team" many times. Maybe I should feel guilty. I don't.
But it was heartbreaking to lose U so young – too soon! And yet not soon enough. U were the perfect companion until your later years when U got so bloody bitchy. Ay ay ay, you and your two little companions, you so cramped my style! I couldn't wait till you got your own pad. You ALWAYS showed up at the wrong time! Still, when U knew your time was up, U accepted your fate and let yourself be cut from my life.
After eight years, I've moved on without U, my womb with a view to all my children. I don't miss U anymore, Uterus, but I will be forever grateful for the times we spent together as one with the Universe and for the four lives you gave me.
[OTIN, thanks for the inspiration. That was fun.]
Couldn't have said it better myself Fragrant! Sure don't miss the little bugger though.
ReplyDeleteWe can just go around blogland and pick up everyone's lost pieces, maybe we can construct another person! I have some fat to contribute! Maybe that will be another post! LOL!
ReplyDeleteBreaking up is hard to do. Unless you have pain pills. LOL
ReplyDeleteI have to admit, I had no CLUE what the hell you were talking about until the very end! LOL
ReplyDeleteJustine :o )
uhmmm okay lovely tribute to a very important part at one time...LOL
ReplyDeleteotin-LOL
Too funny! I have been without mine for 20 years and can honestly say I don't miss it. Cute post!
ReplyDeleteWow.
ReplyDeleteWith the pain in my left side this morning, I'm thinking it is time to yank mine.
ReplyDeleteIt took me like two years to actually realize I was not going to have anymore periods, and it was at that point that I could internalize the real freedom. Then when friends started crying about their cramps and hormone headaches, I relaxed in the knowledge that I'd never have them again. Woo-hoo!
ReplyDeleteI like Otin's idea, but I'm a little worried about the kind of person we could construct.
ReplyDeleteAnd? It sounds like, whatever it is, it will have way too many uteruses.
I am scheduled for breaking up with my U on July 6th. I cannot WAIT. I am only about 15 to 20 days between cycles ever since I scheduled my surgery. I think it knows what's coming, and is really pissed at me. LOL
ReplyDeleteAt first I thought you might be talking about your husband, or an old boyfirend, LOL!
ReplyDeleteYou could get a pet as a kind of replacement...
ReplyDeleteOtin's idea is a litle scary.
I'm just waiting for mine to fall out.
ReplyDeleteWow. Now I kinda wanna lose mine too. Its not like I'm doing anything with it. Seems kinda selfish to keep it.
ReplyDeleteI loved this! I, too, didn't know what you were talking about until the end. What a way to put it!
ReplyDeleteThe way my U has been acting lately, a farewell sounds pretty damned good. And a reconstructed multi-uterus creature? The Oxygen channel's "Snapped" would have a field day with that Frankenstein.
ReplyDeleteYou're not missing yours and I'm thinking that I would definitely NOT miss mine. It was very thoughtful of you to thank it for its service tho. :-)
ReplyDelete*Ouch* (or should I say, "Och?")Hope your recovery is quick and easy.
ReplyDeleteI just seared mine up real good with the rollerball procedure (endometrial oblation). Don't miss my working U one tiny little bit! :)
I am cursing mine as I type. Glad to hear you broke up so easily! LOL
ReplyDeleteI am hear to TOAST YOUR LOSS!!
ReplyDeleteWOO HOO!!!
I LOVe that i don't have to shop for tampons, etc.
However, I AM a bit bitchy. I must say....
Midlife Jobhunter: You know there's a song about that, right?
ReplyDeleteYa-a-a-ank hers away, my friend! Ya-a-a-nk HERS away!
A toast to the loss. It seems to be working well for you without it. Thanks for stopping by my blog.
ReplyDeleteI'm still hanging on to my even though a doctor tells me that if I want a good hard poking with a long (st)ick without feeling like I'm going to hurl, I should have it removed now that I'm done with it.
ReplyDeleteYou know, since my IUD has pretty much ended my period and they were always pretty easy ones anyway, I've decided that I can live without the deep (st)icking.
Too much?
Mine has served its purpose well. Now I wish it would retire. I think it will take about 6 or 7 more years before retirement!
ReplyDeleteLisa: Yikes! He said that? And are you SURE you want to give up the, uh, poking? Maybe just get a shorter stick.
ReplyDeleteI still got mine. She sends her best and oops, just sent me a cramp. Gotta go
ReplyDeleteThis was the absolutely most perfect thing for me to read today...U understand.
ReplyDeleteI love otin's idea..I'll throw in tonsils,adenoids,an appendix and a gall bladder
Peace - Rene
I haven't missed my U one minute since it departed nine years ago. It did it's job and then I was done with it! I'm just a cold, hard bithch!
ReplyDeleteOn obvious love-hate relationship that I will never be able to understand.
ReplyDeleteThis is all still ahead of me. What a lot I have to look forward to. Mine hasn't had any tenants, so it's definitely been a spare womb.
ReplyDeleteSometimes I wish I could kick my uterus.
ReplyDeleteHugs and Mocha,
Stesha
Sometimes I look at my children in all their spoiled, snotty, grumpy, sassy glory, and wish I could rip my uterus out and stomp on it.
ReplyDelete(What's that?! Another year and no Mother of the Year nomination?! Damn.)
Yes, people! A toast to all our Uteruses! Or is that Uteri?
ReplyDeleteR.I.P., U's guys.
I knew there was something going on with U, but I didn't have a clue what it stood for until the very end. Excellent way to put that into perspective.
ReplyDeleteHa ha ha! That was awesome! I lost U too.. almost a year ago now. I don't miss U at all! LOL
ReplyDeleteI thought I was going to lose it when I saw the comment about replacing Ute'R'Us with a pet! too funny! I'm still laffing about that one...
ReplyDelete