Pages

▼

June 14, 2011

Miracle Schmiracle

Bad news, y'all. I turned off my resurrected cell phone last week because the battery was dying and the beeping at 3 a.m. was enough to make me want to fastball it back into the pool. But the thing wouldn't turn on the next morning at all, even after I exposed its little battery and gave it a thorough exam and a full charge—which is disappointing because now I'm forced to rethink what constitutes a miracle, like when I got all excited about Snuggies.

So apparently the Rice-a-Phoni trick only works temporarily, or sometimes, or not at all. So sorry for depleting you of hope. Rice-a-Phony.

THEN, I got a new phone; and last night, after a particularly AWESOME day that left me feeling kind of, like, dumb, I lost my phone. You'll never guess where it was. Think Beach Boys, Good Vibrations, and substitute boob for good. Yeah, that's right. Let me know when you can get that song out of your head now, 'kay?
|
at

26 comments:

  1. chocolatecovereddaydreams.blogspot.comJune 14, 2011 at 5:30 PM

    Hilarious! How long was the phone there before you realized it?

    ReplyDelete
  2. daisyfaeJune 14, 2011 at 6:06 PM

    that's exactly where i keep my phone! i know when it's not there - i feel nekkid without it. only problem? i must exercise GREAT care when bending over to flush toilets...

    ReplyDelete
  3. UnknownJune 14, 2011 at 6:17 PM

    I love reading your posts! LOL

    ReplyDelete
  4. PatJune 14, 2011 at 6:36 PM

    Well, gee, for more excitement, you should store your phone in your undies! At least you FOUND your phone! I was thinking that this situation was going from bad to worse!

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousJune 14, 2011 at 6:44 PM

    10 ways to know a woman does not seriously hope to find a man:
    1: Her cleavage is now occupied by a mobile phone.

    Please fill in the missing nine and forward this to David Letterman.
    -w

    ReplyDelete
  6. Casey FreelandJune 14, 2011 at 6:50 PM

    Bummer. Well, at least it worked long enough for you to get all your important contacts off of it... didn't it?

    I think the rice trick is more for a two second dunk in the toilet, and less for a five minute swim.

    Now you get to shop for something new!

    Cheers,

    Casey

    ReplyDelete
  7. SuzyJune 14, 2011 at 7:30 PM

    The first time I dropped my phone in a toilet, and I did the hairdryer trick, I then went into Verizon when it wouldn't hold a charge and said, in my best "Can you believe it?" voice:

    There is something wrong with this phone. It was working fine and suddenly it stopped and I think you sold me a lemon of a phone.

    Verizon said, "we've had a lot of complaints about this phone so we'll give you another one."

    I had to wonder if a lot of people had dropped their phones into water, pulled the same stunt as me and presto chango, BAD PHONE!!

    The 2nd time I dropped it in a toilet, the phone held the charge.

    Does Verizon read your blog?

    ReplyDelete
  8. anonJune 14, 2011 at 8:34 PM

    The first, last and only time I put my phone in my cleavage, first day with that phone too, I was at work and of course at work I was bent to the ground all day loading explosives into bore-holes. Yeah, first bore-hole of the day and down it went, 30 feet. I blew that phone up with the shot and called it a lesson learned.

    The other night though, when I let the girls out of their bounce reducer, I found some once-frozen peas. Apparently I'm still using the cleavage for food storage.

    ReplyDelete
  9. roryJune 14, 2011 at 9:23 PM

    So stuff gets lost in your boobs a lot?

    ReplyDelete
  10. Sharon RoseJune 14, 2011 at 10:14 PM

    I placed my phone there one day while I was cleaning the bathroom.

    The darn thing hopped right out and dove into the toilet for a nice lil swim.

    I recovered it with gloves, threw it in the trash and got another one.

    Don't you wish they made bras with phone pockets?

    ReplyDelete
  11. macJune 14, 2011 at 10:19 PM

    If you ever need someone to check for you, holler. I'd be glad to help ;-)



    I'm pickin' up good vibrations
    She's giving me excitations
    I'm pickin' up good vibrations
    She's giving me excitations
    Good good good good vibrations
    She's giving me excitations
    Good good good good vibrations
    She's giving me excitations ......

    ReplyDelete
  12. Midlife RoadtripperJune 14, 2011 at 11:56 PM

    See, when you don't have any, you don't have that problem. Phone won't stay there. I always knew there was a good reason for being flat chested.

    ReplyDelete
  13. JimmyJune 15, 2011 at 12:28 AM

    ...and I needed another reason to think about your boobs?

    ReplyDelete
  14. SueannJune 15, 2011 at 5:31 AM

    Is that like looking for your glasses when they are on top of your head? Yeah!! Been there!!
    Hugs
    SueAnn

    ReplyDelete
  15. GaelynJune 15, 2011 at 7:46 AM

    So back to boob stash for your phone. Don't bend over any water. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  16. Captain DumbassJune 15, 2011 at 12:41 PM

    So what's your new phone, a iBoob? Boobberry? Booboid?

    ReplyDelete
  17. XLMICJune 15, 2011 at 12:50 PM

    Whew... you found it! Imagine if you really lost it there :P

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousJune 15, 2011 at 1:50 PM

    Feels kind of nice there. LOL

    ReplyDelete
  19. PearlJune 15, 2011 at 1:58 PM

    Now if you had a CHARGER in there as well...

    Pearl

    ReplyDelete
  20. Linda MedranoJune 15, 2011 at 4:15 PM

    Ah! I'm sorry the rice trick didn't do it for you. But, Honey, stop putting the phone in your boobs. It's not a good look in the first place, and it's hazardous to your communication abilities in the second place since the phones get lost or dumped out with such regularity when you stick them there.

    ReplyDelete
  21. secret agent womanJune 15, 2011 at 6:12 PM

    Ummm, have you thought about storing your phone somewhere else?

    ReplyDelete
  22. Irish GumboJune 15, 2011 at 6:56 PM

    The Captain wins the comments!

    And? I will never be able to get that song out of my head now...

    ReplyDelete
  23. watercolordaisyJune 15, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    ahahahhahaaaaa! Awesome! I totally need to start keeping mine in my boobs.

    ReplyDelete
  24. watercolordaisyJune 15, 2011 at 8:41 PM

    Okay, now after reading the comments, I see I should NOT keep my phone in my boobs.... well drat.

    ReplyDelete
  25. PseudoJune 16, 2011 at 1:08 AM

    ; -) You are fun.

    ReplyDelete
  26. lisahgoldenJune 17, 2011 at 10:27 AM

    I hope your phone number hasn't changed. I'm dying to give you a "call."

    ReplyDelete

You're just itching to leave me a smartass remark, aren't you? But please, no awardy stuff. Thank you!