April 12, 2011

I Noticed Some Stuff

Yup, I was just looking around this week, waiting for word on my ailing laptop, and this is what I noticed:

Backup drives are as important as your last will and testament, especially when losing your hard drive makes you want to roll over and die.

Having to choose between transitive or intransitive lie, lay, laid, lain, lying, or laying makes my brain shrivel to the size of a raisin lying in the sun. Or is it laying in the sun? Kill me now...

My first sunburn of the year took 45 minutes: 15 to burn and 30 to realize the shade had moved.

Tween boys are like pop farts. Cute and gross at the same time.

Source Code is gripping and worth the ticket. Your Highness is ridiculous in a Monty Python sort of way, for which I offer two words and one unforgettable image:  penis medallion.

You never really forget how to cook. It's like having sex. You turn up the heat, throw in the good stuff, and hope it tastes better than it looks.

I don't know how threatening to "rain a shitstorm down on you" got translated to "Nana's gonna poop a storm," but y'all need to quit telling on me. Your mother turned out okay . . .

Tickets are on sale now for my April 30 performance at the Listen to Your Mother Show in Austin, HERE. Come on out and see me!
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41 comments:

XLMIC said...

A show! Mannnnn.... wishing I lived near Austin. I would love to come see your show.

This post is hilarious! And I love the dog's 'bubble'... reminds me of a dog I used to take care of :P

Missy said...

I can burn through a wall! I love a tan....
Great post!~

Kristina P. said...

Oh, man! I wish I lived closer to you! For so many reasons.

Joker_SATX said...

This is why I do both...a Back up drive and Carbonite. Either way, my data is covered. Because as they say in the computer industry...it's not a question of if...it's a question of when...

Eva Gallant said...

I would so come and see you if I lived near Austin!

mac said...

I have a bit too much Irish in me, I burn very quickly.
I don't worry so much about back-ups, most of my fart jokes are committed to memory anyway ;-)

As to Lay, laying, laid, lain, lying: I defer to Dylan ;-)

Liberality said...

I really wish I could come and see you. You are so upbeat and funny and quirky. Love it :~)

Liberality said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Watercolor said...

Glad you are back! I think I burned today sitting on the roof deck at lunch at work.... sigh.

Nancy said...

How I wish I lived in Austin!!

Lost.in.Idaho said...

I have too much Greek in me. I never burn.

And if Austin wasn't an 18 hour drive for me (each way) I'd totally be there. Hope you rock it!

Gaelyn said...

You always make me laugh! Thank you, I really needed that. I'm going to just miss you the 30th in Austin on my way back to AZ from S TX.

LOL! Penis medallion...

ellen abbott said...

OK, you got me with the cooking and sex thing. that one made me laugh.

Bejewell said...

You're so awesome. I can't wait for everyone to see that other side of you at Listen To Your Mother.

(Metaphorically speaking, of course. Although you DID seem to have a great ass.)

ignorethebucklesonmyjacket said...

I lost some scripts via a hard drive crash...I have them printed though. That sucked.

slommler said...

Penis medallion huh? Ha!!
Sorry about your laptop!! Sigh! everyone's shared nightmare for sure!!
Good luck with your performance.
Hugs
SueAnn

Candice said...

You rock!!

Maybe some day I'll get to see you perform here In Dallas. :)

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

When you take the show on the road, please come out to Oregon. I would love to see your show.

Gotta love the grandkids who accidentally tattle tale.

Heidi-"Heidi in Real Life" said...

Wish I could see your show! Loved the sunburn comment--so true!

Jimmy said...

Welcome back onboard the Blog Bus hen, you have been missed.

injaynesworld said...

For back up I use Carbonite. $50 a year and I never have to think about it. I so wish I could see you in Austin. How exciting. Just enjoy every minute of it. Then go out and get drunk.

Linda Medrano said...

Dang Girl, if you were performing in Los Angeles I'd fly down to see you. I know you'll be great! Please tell me somebody is going to video tape it! I'd love to see you. This post was the cat's pajamas!

Hilary said...

LOL.. keep on noticing stuff.. so I can keep on laughing.

formerlyonlyamovie said...

I'd love to see your show - am too far away.

My laptop died a while back and I'm still mourning the lost data. Ack.

I always burn...

meleah rebeccah said...

YAY! You're back!

I would just roll up and DIE if I lost my computer / everything on my hard-drive.

"Tween boys are like pop farts. Cute and gross at the same time."

AHHAHHAHHA. Very, true!

Julie said...

Hey mama, just catching up on my blog reading! I still have tan from the cruise...but it's fading fast!

Fred Miller said...

We use Carbonite, too. I figure if we're already paying for high speed, might as well use it.

And remember. You gotta lie to get laid.

Robin Allen said...

The cooking analogy made me spit wine out of my nose. I have my ticket and can't wait to see you rock that stage!

Lisa said...

Excellent! You're in Listen to Your Mother! That is so cool. Wish I could be there.

Also - rain a shitstorm? I'm borrowing that.

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tokenblogger said...

If only I were going to be in Austin.

Sausage Fingers said...

This is the kind of post that makes my day. Thank you.
Sausage...

secret agent woman said...

I got a little sunburn on my arms this week when I was out walking. Time to crack out the sunblock!

Murr Brewster said...

My backup hard drive was expensive and blew up three months in. The nice people sent me a new one and it quit two months in. I don't have the heart to send it back. I've got my entire intellectual property on a pair of thumb drives. I'm screwed, aren't I?

You were lying in the sun, or you were laid in the sun. It kinda depends. Either way, you aren't in Oregon.

Bella said...

I swear there must be some gadget spell placed on computer equip cause I have been having the same trouble here for a week; just today got everything resolved and my router is working! YAY! Congrats on the program, can one hear this somewhere on the web?

Danica said...

I'm still laughing at pop farts!!!!

Great post!

Bee's Blog said...

Laughing out loud and wishing that I lived in or near Austin!

Always have an external hard drive handy - take that how you like - and remember to 'burn' everything not just your skin!

Jocelyn said...

You are FAMOUSER THAN I KNEW!!???

This is me, flying to The States so's I can hear you.

Annie (Lady M) x said...

LMAO ...... did you really notice all those things? Bloody funny - you have way too much time on your hands you loon-bag! ;-)

Bella said...

heyyyyy tomorrow's the big day! hope all goes well.

injaynesworld said...

Hey -- how did your performance go? I hope you're going to write about it.