June 14, 2011

Miracle Schmiracle

Bad news, y'all. I turned off my resurrected cell phone last week because the battery was dying and the beeping at 3 a.m. was enough to make me want to fastball it back into the pool. But the thing wouldn't turn on the next morning at all, even after I exposed its little battery and gave it a thorough exam and a full charge—which is disappointing because now I'm forced to rethink what constitutes a miracle, like when I got all excited about Snuggies.

So apparently the Rice-a-Phoni trick only works temporarily, or sometimes, or not at all. So sorry for depleting you of hope. Rice-a-Phony.

THEN, I got a new phone; and last night, after a particularly AWESOME day that left me feeling kind of, like, dumb, I lost my phone. You'll never guess where it was. Think Beach Boys, Good Vibrations, and substitute boob for good. Yeah, that's right. Let me know when you can get that song out of your head now, 'kay?
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27 comments:

Wow, that was awkward said...

Your boobs are not very phone friendly.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Hilarious! How long was the phone there before you realized it?

daisyfae said...

that's exactly where i keep my phone! i know when it's not there - i feel nekkid without it. only problem? i must exercise GREAT care when bending over to flush toilets...

Eva Gallant said...

I love reading your posts! LOL

Pat said...

Well, gee, for more excitement, you should store your phone in your undies! At least you FOUND your phone! I was thinking that this situation was going from bad to worse!

Anonymous said...

10 ways to know a woman does not seriously hope to find a man:
1: Her cleavage is now occupied by a mobile phone.

Please fill in the missing nine and forward this to David Letterman.
-w

Casey Freeland said...

Bummer. Well, at least it worked long enough for you to get all your important contacts off of it... didn't it?

I think the rice trick is more for a two second dunk in the toilet, and less for a five minute swim.

Now you get to shop for something new!

Cheers,

Casey

Suzy said...

The first time I dropped my phone in a toilet, and I did the hairdryer trick, I then went into Verizon when it wouldn't hold a charge and said, in my best "Can you believe it?" voice:

There is something wrong with this phone. It was working fine and suddenly it stopped and I think you sold me a lemon of a phone.

Verizon said, "we've had a lot of complaints about this phone so we'll give you another one."

I had to wonder if a lot of people had dropped their phones into water, pulled the same stunt as me and presto chango, BAD PHONE!!

The 2nd time I dropped it in a toilet, the phone held the charge.

Does Verizon read your blog?

powdergirl said...

The first, last and only time I put my phone in my cleavage, first day with that phone too, I was at work and of course at work I was bent to the ground all day loading explosives into bore-holes. Yeah, first bore-hole of the day and down it went, 30 feet. I blew that phone up with the shot and called it a lesson learned.

The other night though, when I let the girls out of their bounce reducer, I found some once-frozen peas. Apparently I'm still using the cleavage for food storage.

rory said...

So stuff gets lost in your boobs a lot?

Pastor Sharon said...

I placed my phone there one day while I was cleaning the bathroom.

The darn thing hopped right out and dove into the toilet for a nice lil swim.

I recovered it with gloves, threw it in the trash and got another one.

Don't you wish they made bras with phone pockets?

mac said...

If you ever need someone to check for you, holler. I'd be glad to help ;-)



I'm pickin' up good vibrations
She's giving me excitations
I'm pickin' up good vibrations
She's giving me excitations
Good good good good vibrations
She's giving me excitations
Good good good good vibrations
She's giving me excitations ......

Midlife Jobhunter said...

See, when you don't have any, you don't have that problem. Phone won't stay there. I always knew there was a good reason for being flat chested.

Jimmy said...

...and I needed another reason to think about your boobs?

slommler said...

Is that like looking for your glasses when they are on top of your head? Yeah!! Been there!!
Hugs
SueAnn

Gaelyn said...

So back to boob stash for your phone. Don't bend over any water. ;)

Captain Dumbass said...

So what's your new phone, a iBoob? Boobberry? Booboid?

XLMIC said...

Whew... you found it! Imagine if you really lost it there :P

Danica said...

Feels kind of nice there. LOL

Pearl said...

Now if you had a CHARGER in there as well...

Pearl

Linda Medrano said...

Ah! I'm sorry the rice trick didn't do it for you. But, Honey, stop putting the phone in your boobs. It's not a good look in the first place, and it's hazardous to your communication abilities in the second place since the phones get lost or dumped out with such regularity when you stick them there.

secret agent woman said...

Ummm, have you thought about storing your phone somewhere else?

Irish Gumbo said...

The Captain wins the comments!

And? I will never be able to get that song out of my head now...

Watercolor said...

ahahahhahaaaaa! Awesome! I totally need to start keeping mine in my boobs.

Watercolor said...

Okay, now after reading the comments, I see I should NOT keep my phone in my boobs.... well drat.

Pseudo said...

; -) You are fun.

Lisa said...

I hope your phone number hasn't changed. I'm dying to give you a "call."