March 24, 2010

Grind and Rewind, or Just Say No to Recycling

My license to be me is up for renewal. Because, people, I'm tired of tripping through the daily grind that is work, work, work at both my office and home, only to show up the next day to do the exact same thing. It's grind and rewind, ad infinitum. And it sucks hippopotamus butt.

See, a few years ago, I joined the ARMY (Amazing Reluctant Midlife Youngsters) where I gave myself permission to be all I wanna be. But somehow I lost focus. I went AWOL (All Weird, Old, and Lame). Life matters got in the way and dragged me down, and I let them. Cuz, you guessed it, I am way too responsible. I recycled myself dull.

I call this phenomenon: Shit, when did I get so tedious?

So I'm kicking off a campaign in pursuit of renewable energy—you know, on a personal level. Cuz I'm of an age where it's all about me-me-me. You guys can totally handle the planetary stuff. Meanwhile, I want to do things and go places I always dreamed about but didn't because of (a) kids, (b) money, (c) time, and (d) laziness. I've conquered the behemoth that is parenting, and I've ordered special mega-vitamins to combat chronic sloth. Now all I need in massive quantities are time and money. I'm just saying, you can get a whole lot of self-renewing done with no clock and lots of green, can't you?

My plan is specifically—in general—to reinvigorate, rejuvenate, and reinvent. To you, that just means I'm going to do stuff I haven't quite figured out yet, but on which I will think real hard. What I know for sure is that being less responsible and more spontaneous is equivalent to being less filling and tasting great, and therefore a worthy goal. So stay tuned, and just say no to recycling. I'm telling you, it's not healthy.

44 comments:

Jana said...

That comparison was very true and very funny. The fact that you have realized about you getting tedious has already got the ball rolling I believe

Jocelyn said...

The fact that I'm outrageously excited to know the details of your plan, once you decide on them, doesn't at all indicate that I have no life, right?

Just, wow. Go for it. Do new stuff! And then write about it, so we can giggle.

tattytiara said...

Honey don't just do what makes you happy, find someone to pay you to do it!

mac said...

Sing it, Sister!

I found my self humming that old Queen song, I Want to Break Free !


And, that hippo's ass is freaking SEXY!!

Anonymous said...

You decided to take good care of your mind and your body-great decision!

Murr Brewster said...

I don't know, you could start with sucking hippopotamus butt--whatever it is, it's not tedious. Unless you do it every day.

mo.stoneskin said...

I'm already saying no to recycling. Local authority won't collect anything that isn't glass or paper and I can't be bothered...

...um that wasn't what you were talking about was it?

I'm looking forward to the new, invigorated, even sharper you.

Macey said...

Love your definition of Army and AWOL!

Formerly known as Frau said...

Good luck! I wish I had the balls to do that too! Just too lazy.

A Daft Scots Lass said...

Its too much work!

Irish Gumbo said...

Hop in the van, my dear...we are heading in the same direction!

(you said butt. hehheh)

Anonymous said...

Does this mean you'll be going bungee jumping?

Di
The Blue Ridge Gal

The Giraffe Head Tree said...

Whatever bliss you find honey, enjoy it to the hilt! Go for the gusto! (...hey, snappy slogan eh?)

Jazz said...

It's grind and rewind, ad infinitum

Sounds like my life.

Unknown said...

I can't decide whether I'm Army or AWOL. Maybe both!

ellen abbott said...

So you're going back to the gym? Ha ha ha, I'm so funny. But seriously, all you need is the money honey. Once you have that the time thing takes care of itself. so, you'll let me know when you find the money tree, right? Right?

Violet said...

That? Is beautiful, man.

I just started a part-time second job which will help with the money part...but which also kinda screws up the time part. But it's all part of my dastardly plan...

foxy said...

Hey - I'll join you in being less responsible and more spontaneous!!

For some reason, your name made me giggle today. Cock... rill. Sometimes it's like I'm 10 all over again.

Steel Magnolia said...

Brava! Imagine the possibilities. Rock on soul sistah ...

OmaLindasOldeBaggsandStuftShirts said...

you go girl, do the dew, have it your way...too much huh?
You best be getting it done now cuz when you get old and creepy, er creaky like me you can only read and LMAO. You are a bright spot in my day. Shine on darlin'

CiCi said...

'Fess up, where did you get my picture?
Your outline of a plan to maybe kinda do new stuff sounds great to me! It is a beginning and if you tread easily and see how you like new stuff you can have some fun. Go for it!

Carma Sez said...

Oh I hear ya - I've only got 4 years and I'll be in the same position as you. And I've been so uber responsible and non-spontaneous all these years I would love to shed that side of me completely and stop being labeled the "fun ruiner" :D

The Girl Next Door said...

I resembled this issue! Then I got DIVORCED and voila, no more recycling. Awesome. Here's hoping you find your switch to turn it all ON for you!

Midlife Roadtripper said...

"being less responsible and more spontaneous is equivalent to tasting great and being less filling"

You betcha baby! Doors opening for you so don't ponder too much. Wander through them.

BrightenedBoy said...

What a goal to pursue.

I really wish you the best of luck. Ensuring that we keep something for ourselves as we get older, while fulfilling our responsibilities, is a challenging but rewarding task.

Boozy Tooth said...

Hey girl! Swing by the Casa and pick up a little something in your honor, chica.

Jeanie said...

"No clock and lots of green" sounds like the best plan ever. Take my word, "conquering the behemoth that is parenting" can open doors to things you have barely imagined before. I just need to quit the tedium that is work and I'll be good to go.
Go for it!

Mixed Reflections said...

Ah yes, not only does it pay off to review that bucket list every now and then, but it really pays off to tick off some things on it. I wish fewer of mine involved extravagant loads of dinero. Love that rhino's arse. Makes me feel better about mine.

Maggie May said...

this made me smiiiile!!!

Julie D said...

I'm with ya, sister. No more "beige" life for me. I'm ready for some blazing technicolor!

Madame DeFarge said...

Love it. I feel like I am sliding into tedium and this makes me think that maybe I could do something about it too. Look forward to hearing more about this.

Senorita said...

Thanks for leaving a comment on my blog. I found it a little late.

I added you and have some catching up to do.

injaynesworld said...

Good for you, girlfriend! Sounds like a helluva plan. I've too often found that when I had money I had no time and vice-versa, so I hope it all syncs up for you, and if you get out my way you'll have a wine buddy to hang with.

Captain Dumbass said...

Chronic sloth syndrome. Yep, got that.

mac said...

You've purdied up the place a little bit.

Nice :-)

linda said...

Recycling, reinventing. Always a good thing to do. I am in that place right now. Stir crazy and utterly boring. I wonder if I suddenly took my clothes off in the supermarket it may kick start something.

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

Wat a great way to put it.

Yes! On to the fun, less responsible stage of life. I'll join you when I get these last couple of kids out fo the house!

5 Kids With Disabilities said...

Go for it! Enjoy life! Find wonder in sunsets, 2 old people holding hands, eating lobster with lots of butter...life holds so many surprises!
Lindsey Petersen

Shrinky said...

Oh Gawd, do I want some of that, shove up, I'm coming over..

Everyday Goddess said...

You are so great! I'm laughing at the ARMY thing, mostly because it's so me.
Very inspiring!

Pat said...

You are one clever, clever writer! I enjoyed that!

Anonymous said...

Yep, with ya all the way!

Anna
x

Liz Mays said...

I can't wait to see what kind of fun you're going to have...perhaps you'll start working on a bucket list of sorts?!

Mike said...

Less responsible and more spontaneous usually means poor and unemployed! haha!