Why bitch? Awhile back a friend reminded me that other female animal names exist, but we don't hear them hurled at us in anger. Can you imagine your guy being so pissed at you that he calls you a "fucking jenny?" Wow, dude, that hurt. Or take that pain-in-the-ass coworker whose best skill is backstabbing others in an effort to make herself look good (you know the one). What if she spits at you, "Damn peahen!" Um, ouch? Nope, nothing carries the same weight as a well-aimed, vehemently uttered "Bitch!"
I admit, I am a fan of this word. I am this word occasionally—no apologies. But I really don't like the word yelled at me in a manner specifically designed to hurt me. I personally don't use it on anybody else unless it's in good fun (as in, "Girlfriend, you are stinkin' hawt! You bitch!") or in reference to an authentic bitch-on-wheels while he or she is nowhere around. I have no problem with civil confrontation when it's warranted, but face to face bitch-calling just results in cat fights—of which I am not a fan—and gives women a bad name.
Let's examine the way bitch makes its grand entrance in anger. Slow motion, shall we? There's the preliminary buildup that consists of the deliverer's head either spinning to a halt or snapping upward into the lock-and-load position. Eyes zero in on you to the exclusion of all proximal happenings, lips quiver and curl while nostrils flare toro-esquely, teeth vibrate and the jaw juts out as if in a wanton lunge for your throat. And then the noise bolts out, uninhibited. Sharp and arrogant, insistent and insidious, punctuated on the rearend with a succinct "ch" that reverberates in your ear canal and sands the tip right off your tail bone.
How would it be if every time we were gifted with this moniker, our entire demeanor changed, we grew a grin, and chirped, "I knew you liked me!" If the power to hurt us with this word were diminished by a hearty welcome, those who wield it so caustically would have to resort to using something else. Of course, then I'd have to reclaim a different word for the purposes of ranting. Point is, I think we ought to get a little more creative. Switch things up.
Try it, will ya? And let me know how the freakin' hinneys respond.