August 16, 2009

48 Hours of Advice: Updated

Who knew the anticipation of meeting someone could make a person so wonky inside? Yes, I said wonky. I have all this . . . stuff just sitting inside my chest, all these incredibly fun and fabulous and frightening thoughts inside my head. Maybe it's because of all the advice I've been given in the last 48 hours:

"Look stunning."
This from a guy. What does this mean? There's no red carpet, no acceptance speech. Remember, simple girl on the outside, maybe some complexities on the inside. I do admit to a fascination with sexy pirates and vamps. But I digress. I need specifics, people. What articles of clothing would equal stunning? Hair and makeup? How do I do stunning? Is this a requirement?

"Be innocent and shy, and in total control."
BWAAAAA-HAHAHAHA. And I thought this guy knew me. Innocent, like Scarlet, sugar. Shy, what is that? In total control, I don't even have that with the remote. Then he mentioned I shouldn't talk so much. Okay, he does know me. I promise to be demure.

"Wear something sleazy so he'll be speechless."
This from a guy too. Sleazy would leave him speechless, all right. Not quite what I'm going for. Can't be too conservative either. So somewhere in the vast expanse of rockin' first date attire there has to be something for me to wear, right? I'm just not sure it's in my closet.

"Wear something black. It will make your skin glow!"
Shheeeyyaaahh! No likey too much sun these days. Miscreant youth spent in way too much sun.

Then there was this conversation with my daughter Scoots, bringing 4-inch turquoise stilettos out of her Smithsonian-style shoe museum . . .

Scoots: You gotta wear these!

Me, trying them on at her dogged insistence: Holy crap, I can't even stand in these. I'll look like a Barbie doll, and I'll walk like one too.

Scoots: No, no. I have a secret. Take flipflops and leave them in the car. Wear the stilettos into the restaurant – ten minutes on your feet coming and ten going. If he wants to go somewhere else, you say, "These shoes are killing me. I think I have something more comfortable in the car." Then you go to the car. "Oh, looky there! Flipflops!"

Me, with blank look: Seriously?

Scoots, taking a drag on her beer: Oh yeah.

Then from my daughter's 20-something buddies:

"Go for the wax job. Guys love it."
First I have to stop laughing. People, this is a first date!

And finally:
"Play up the girls."
Now that I can do. Dinner at 7.

===================================
Update: It was Chardonnay and meteors of the heart-pounding kind. And let's say that when I got home, jumped into bed, and tried to finish off a Stephanie Plum novel, I had to reread the same three pages a dozen times because thoughts of him kept intruding. I likey that boy.

34 comments:

Anonymous said...

Aren't you glad you received so much help from everyone.. LOL.... I'd play up the girls. but please, NO STILETTOS!! They are just way to slutty. Right? Can I get an amen anyone?? How about you, Mr. Fine?? Stilettos = Slut. I knew you'd agree because you ooze of gentleman, don't you.

Snappy

Anonymous said...

my stilettos generally make an appearance later down the road... and sometimes? i never have to stand in them, let alone walk in them!

girl, you're stunning! just be KJ...

Sarah Lulu said...

You are gorgeous just as you are.

Be yourself.

He's the one who's going to have to work at being Mr. Wonderful.

Michelle Grant said...

Hmmm, it's 10:30 pm now so let's hope that date is in full swing. Well, er ... not FULL swing but .... hell, you know what I mean. Sending positive vibes.

Kristina P. said...

Play up the girls is just good life advice.

Raul said...

Chica, I bet he was already hooked when you opened your online chemistry set. It won't make any difference what you wear.

You'll be frosting his cake and he'll be wandering around wondering why the stars seem so much brighter tonight.

Midlife Roadtripper said...

Okay, did you go with sleazy?

Now 1:28am and no report.

Can you tell which friends are tapping their feet in anticipation?

lovelyprism said...

Oh boy! lol I say, wear something that makes you FEEL beautiful, doesn't matter if it's sexy or sleazy or god forbid, demure. You need to be comfortable and relaxed and then you can just be yourself. :)
P.S. NO FLIP FLOPS! jeez

The Peach Tart said...

I say show the girls just a bit and wear the stilettos but other than that nothing too flashy.

darsden said...

woooohooo, now I am getting excited for you.. some mystorey added in love it. So, be sure you get a picture I wanna see those shoes :-)

Mike said...

Geez, you got everything except "Go down on him under the table" LMAO! That is a great way to keep a man's interest! hahahahaha!

Julie D said...

Can't wait for the follow up post!!! Just getting caught up on my blog reading. Happy Sunday!

Anonymous said...

You are beautiful! I'm sure whatever you wore was perfect and stunning!

However, I'm still going to stick with the wax:) Its the best way to go...and yes they do love it;) hehehehe!!

~Sacha~

Stephanie said...

Oh you know it was good when you can't concentrate on the book! Yeah you!

shrink on the couch said...

Sooo, what did you wear? I'm still laughing about the advice to wear something sleazy (or was that slutty?).

Regardless, it's wonderful that you like what you see (and hear) so far!

anon said...

I really wanna know how this turned out!

And yeah, you're lovely,so you do what you want to do and it'll be better than fine.

http://howtobecomeacatladywithoutthecats.blogspot.com said...

Wow! A real live date? I wouldn't even know where to begin... except for probably losing the old, comfy tee and shorts.

Vic said...

Woo Hoo!! Glad the date went well. Was it a cleavage/stiletto combo or a more subtle approach? Details!

Lori said...

Yay! I look forward to hearing how this all went. I say, keep being your wonderful self and you can't go wrong!

Sharon Rose said...

Wow. . . I'd be feeling wonky too! great post!

Duchess said...

Well, hey, your daughter is a smart girl.

midlife slices said...

OOOhh...now we need more details and pictures. Just tell him you've got to run his mug through your online database for clearance screening. I'm certain he'll understand. :) j

p.s. I hope he's a keeper!!

Kimberly said...

Work it sister! Work it! Remember a lady never wipes her mouth & she dabs.

bernthis said...

yeah you! I love that feeling. so glad you had a great time

Unknown said...

So now we want to hear more. If he has you reading the same three pages, it must've been good!!!

Amy said...

Stilletos on a first date? No. But, after he gets to experience the "real" you for a bit, ramp up the heat a little by throwing on a pair of fabulous platform stilletos. All good girls have a little devil inside, don't they? And, all good boys like a little heat.

Organic Meatbag said...

Ahhh, I am lamenting that I only just found this blog because I would have suggested carrying around one of those old timey bike horns and communicate with you date only with the horn...

Him: So what do you do?
You: Honka-honka!
Him: Are you feeling OK?
You: Honk-a honk!!!

Unknown said...

Reading the same pages over and over... a very good sign my friend! Wow, what an impression he must have made!

Today am announcing a FUN giveaway thingie on my post which will begin next Monday... come visit and see what I'm talking about!

foxy said...

"play up the girls" - exactly what i would've said! then you don't even have to worry about what you're wearing... ha!

can't wait to meet him... ;)

Bookworm said...

Yup be yourself. That's my advice.

But it sounds like you don't need it.'Cuz you already had your date...and you "likey that boy. "

Yay!!! :))

Anonymous said...

Lack of concentration...a very good sign!! I cannot wait to hear more...Anissa

Michel said...

OOH! This is sooo exciting. Did he call? when are you going to see him again?

Does this mean you're not going to tell me what happened - I mean you don't have to tell all those other freaks (my GOD! Otin will hear)...JUST ME! HA!

I can't WAIT!

Debbie said...

That just makes me smile. I am so happy knowing you have someone you like.

Vanessa said...

Sounds like it was a great date regardless of what you were wearing. Next date is???