April 2, 2009

Who Loves Ya, Baby?

Last night, post-salsa lessons, look what I uncovered when I turned on the lights in my bathroom. It was such a nice surprise, I got a little teary, so I had to preserve the moment for posterity. Who knows, when she one day pays exorbitant amounts for therapy and finally figures out what I did wrong in raising her, she may change her mind. So I will keep this just in case she needs to be reminded that she was once kinda fond of me.

Maybe she left me such a sweet message because she felt guilty. Why? Hmmm, let's see. Maybe for:

  • at age 2, sneaking out the window, toddling down the street, and scaring the bejeezus out of me; or
  • at age 6, pantsing the neighbor girl whose mom "had a talk" with me and refused to let them play together anymore; or
  • at age 9, stuffing a dead chicken into the old fridge (in order to plan for a proper burial), and then forgetting about it until weeks later when Grandpa was horrified to discover its feathery, rotting corpse teeming with maggots; or
  • at age 1o, hacking off all the hair on the back bottom-half of her head, and then blaming it on her older sisters' evil midnight debauchery while she snoozed right through it; or
  • at age 12, getting drunk on Seagram's 57 during a sleepover at her BFF's (yes, you Stacey) and calling me to confess because she was so sick she thought she was dying; or
  • at age 13, disassembling and rewiring her bedroom lamp to convert it into a black light, then plugging it into the socket, shocking the shit out of herself, and blowing the power out of the entire house; or
  • at age 14, ditching school so I had to have an uncomfortable f-t-f with the high school principal; or
  • at age 14, telling me she'd started her period when in fact she had not, and then kept up the ruse for another two years because it was a good excuse for playing hookey; or
  • at age 15, smoking in the garage when she thought I was sleeping; or
  • at age 16, making me play Sherlock Holmes to track her down when she thought she'd successfully duped me (her parental unit, aka, P.U.); or
  • at age 18, bringing home that bad boy who ended up staying for, like, four years; or . . .
Oh, boy, I think I'll stop now. My own mother is probably loving this a little too much. Yes, payback's a bitch!

Our gorgeous "Critter" just turned 26 and is an awesome mother in her own right. Now that she has a little one to test her sanity, she has probably gained magical insights and forgiven me for my mistakes. Or maybe -- just maybe, she loves me in spite of them. Which brings us back to guilt -- hers or mine, I don't know. But I'm going with Door #2. At least until she gets into therapy.

----------------
P.S. Pay no attention to that funky header. It's not quite what I wanted, but I have been too freakin' busy to fix it. No, Janie, I'm not kissing an F. I'm blowing fragrant lies. Isn't it obvious?
.

31 comments:

Justine/Justiney/Tiney said...

OMG, please tell me that my girls aren't going to do these horrible things in their teen years! But at 9 putting the dead chicken (where the fuck did she find a dead chicken that wasn't from the supermarket?) in the fridge to rot? OMG!!!!!!!!!!

Justine :o )

Michel said...

If you start feeling down on yourself, just call my mom. She LOVES to tell the story about how when I was a kid I hid a tuna sandwhich that I didn't want to eat in the heat register - and we found it 6 months later when we had to turn on the heat.

Get over it already. Frankly, as I like to point out, if she were a better cook, we probably would not have been in that situation. Even at a young age I was always "helping" her...

daisyfae said...

girls are sneaky. with boys, you always know what's on their little minds after the age of 10... she sounds like a sweet girl! momma done good!

nothingfancy1 said...

Ahhh...yep...she loves her mom, that's for sure.

It's all the things you listed, but not because of guilt - because you were there for her during all of those times, my dear!

lisa said...

I'd say she loves you for reals. She's very lucky to have you.

smiles4u said...

That is the sweetest thing ever!! It's amazing that with all that our kids put us through while growing up, that eventually they come full circle and do such sweet things to tell us that they love us. I think she really loves you...hell what's not to love?

Danica Lynn said...

How sweet is that?

Anna Russell said...

That is so sweet. I think she just loves her mum (or mom, as you guys say). You must have done a great job raising her.

Nancy said...

Ahh, your daughter went easy on you over the years!!!

I think she really hearts you, they never feel guilt until they have spawn of their own!

Jan said...

Oh, good grief - I think our daughters are related. I have had little problem with her brothers, so I think she felt she had to make up for them.

Oh, the stories I could swap with you.

foxy gal said...

You're a good mama and they DO love you! Come on, how could anyone not!? ;>

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

What a great way to turn on a light. souns like she has definately kept life intersting ; -)

Gaston Studio said...

LOL, I can so relate to quite a few of those as my two girls pulled the same, or very similar, things. I'll never forget having to call a lawyer friend of mine to get my oldest out of 'jail' when she got picked up for driving under the influence on graduation night... at the beach, no less! Thank God for friends because he dealt with it so that it wasn't even on her driving record.

Yeah, I think I'd come up with something else for the header too!
Jane

Roshni Mitra Chintalapati said...

Ok, so she just obliterated all her 'mistakes' with that beautiful piece, didn't she?!

You are SO kissing the F!!!

Smart Mouth Broad said...

Happy Birthday to your sweet daughter. She is beautiful just like her mama.

Gran said...

Wonderful post. My parents, rest both their souls, used to enjoy telling how I tried to swing on the bath/shower pole when I was 11. I nearly knocked myself unconscious, and had to pay for a new pole out of my allowance :)

Kids. Aren't we wonderful?

Wonderful post.

Wunderwoman said...

Thank you!! I thought I was the only one had stories like that to tell about my boys...whew..I am not alone

boylerpf said...

Well, you put into words what girls are all about. They make you eat your words when they get older, right? I had one that I swear would put me in the insane asylum and is the best today...go figure. Love your blog!

Anonymous said...

It's amazing isn't it? You love them no matter what....and if you wait around long enough, they usually get the picture, altho I still think sometimes that I am still the ogre in the eyes of most of my children. But, it is wonderful to have them acknowledge it sometimes just out of the blue that they love you too. Kinda makes your day, huh? Mom

midlifeslices said...

LOL That post is priceless. It's amazing how time can heal most memories and that person you thought you hated....is now your most beloved in the world.

Now...about that header disclaimer......

O.k. If you say so. LOL

nikkicrumpet said...

Awww what a sweet present to find. You must have done something right...seems through all the mischief she turned out gorgeous, happy, and a good mommy. Nice work!

steppinthru said...

These are the reasons we get gray hairs! When my kids start complaining about their children I have to remind them of some of their own little histories. She is a beautiful young woman and soon she will be paying for her raising and you will just smile and remember.

Andrea's Sweet Life said...

Oh GAH, she sounds just like ME growing up.

And you know what? As an adult, especially now that I have kids of my own, I know my mom did a kick-ass job of raising me. On my best days, I hope I'm half the mom she was. No, is.

Thanks for stopping by Sweet Life!

Jocelyn said...

I love the litany of moments remembered. The two of you together are a force of nature.

livingladolcevita said...

Very cool idea...it's been a while since I surprised my mom with something like this...

Midlife Jobhunter said...

Ah, that is so sweet. Mother of girls. I'll never know. (If they're not in therapy yet, you probably did okay.)

Janie at Sounding Forth said...

You and your daughter are beautiful!!

I love this story. Seriously. Now tell TOJ (The other Janie) to get off your ass.

Debbie said...

I'm glad you took a photo of it! How sweet (and she did owe you!).

Amy said...

I'm not quite to the point with my 21 year-old yet where I can post a list like this without crying. Give me a couple of more years. Of course by then, I'll have a 17 year old and a 15 year old so I'll probably have completely lost my sense of humor all together.

Elaine at Lipstickdaily said...

Congratulations on making it this far . . . and having the courage to make the list!

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