May 19, 2009

Heaven's a Bad Place


When my sister Dee died last October, we had to tell my then-four-year-old granddaughter. Dee and Miss America were very close. After shedding many tears, Miss America did a lot of deep thinking, like so many of us, trying to make sense of things like car accidents and death. A couple months later, this was our conversation:

“Heaven’s a bad place.” So says Miss America as we cuddle on the sofa watching Shrek2.

“What?” I say. “Heaven’s a good place.”

Miss America shakes her head and looks up at me with big brown eyes that reveal how much she’s learned of life and death lately.

“I don’t want to go there,” she says firmly.

“Well, you don’t have to go there now.”


“Only people gets dead there.”

I can’t argue this point.

“So I don’t want to go,” she continues. “Heaven’s a bad place.”


She opens the brightly colored spiral notebook in her lap and informs me: “I’m going to write that down in my diarrea.”


Some days, that's the only viewpoint that feels right.
.

31 comments:

blognut said...

Awww - that is so bittersweet. It's amazing how black and white things are when you're 4.

Chairman Bill said...

You will spend a subjective nanosecond in objective eternity before waking up inside the holographic memory a supercomputer capabale of recreating a quantum facsimilie of everyone who ever lived - or indeed could ever have lived.

See the Omega Point in Wiki, or click on my icon to go straight there from right here.

♥ Braja said...

I do love the depth of thought that these subjects arouse in us...thank you so much for this post, it was lovely...bittersweet, as Blognut says...so so sweet, Miss America...

I think the Chairman has been drinking.... :)

Kristina P. said...

I am grateful to belong to a religion where what happens after we die is so heavily talked about. But death still terrifies me!

Pseudo said...

Out of the mouths of babes... wisdom.

Jan said...

Since I don't believe in an afterlife, I don't spend much time thinking about my death.

Miss America is one smart little girl...

Unknown said...

As others have said, bittersweet and so wise of beautiful Miss America. So glad she had a diarrea in which to write these things down.

Vic said...

I love Miss America. She makes me laugh and breaks my heart in equal measure.

Expat From Hell said...

Priceless, absolutely priceless. I need to give that some more thought and write it into my own diarrhea. Such a fitting description of that pile of pages, and from a child. You are putting up some great stuff. Thanks.

ExpatFromHell

Patsy said...

Sorry that you lost your sister, but awfully glad that you have that little child to bring you smiles.

I am not a believer, but I think about these things all the time, this big final mystery.


~Lorna

Roshni said...

Ah, to be immortal! But then as they say, be careful what you wish for!!

blissfully caffeinated said...

Aw, I had a little tear in my eye until I got the point where she was going to write it down in her diarrhea. Then I snorted coffee through my nose and fell off my chair. That's hilarious.

Call Me Cate said...

I came to thank you for following my blog but this post gifted me with two of the things I value much - something to think about and something to smile about. So thank you also for that.

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

None of us knows what happens after we die. That is and always will remain a great mystery. What we do have is the wonderful, magical power of now. I love how Miss America uses her powers to question, ponder, and opine. That is indeed what life is all about.

Unknown said...

Having been in chilcare forever, I can see the funny in this! It is precious!!

Beth said...

She is wise beyond her years! An interesting perspective.

AiringMyLaundry said...

I teared up at this.

What a smart little girl.

Justine said...

Miss America is one shrewd little cutie, isn't she? I'm sorry you lost your sister and that MA suffered so badly from the loss. I think we all question the afterlife, even if our faith is strong. I know I do.

Justine :o )

Debbie said...

That is too cute! Sad, but cute. Kids can always make things beautifully simple.

zelzee said...

I write about that dying stuff right in my diarrea, too.

Smart little Miss America.

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

It is always a mystery how a child's brain perceives things such a death. It would be a treat to read her diarrhea later in life!

Unknown said...

Kids...they just tell it like it is, and sometimes it really IS...

Love Miss America

Peace - Rene

Natalie said...

I am loving the little Miss, she is delightful and terribly smart - as they so often are.xx♥

Tootsie said...

sad...but so adorable...and kinda true...
thanks for visiting..and for checking in on my lil sis

Midlife Roadtripper said...

I'm still so sorry about Dee. Oh, so lovely there is "diarrea" to balance loss--even though hard to see some times.

Anonymous said...

Everything is so clear through the eyes of a 4 year old. And, the thing is, she's right.

xox

ShanaM said...

That is cute. I love what kids say and think about things.

jewelrybyrebecca said...

Wow, I don't know how you held yourself together after that.
You can always learn something from someone so innocent.

Anonymous said...

That's so cute! Very smart little girl. I have a four-yearold boy, and he recently informed a random smoker in the street, much to my embarassment, that "if you smoke you get sick and then you get dead". He made a very good point though.

....since we were on the subject of death and how four-yearolds think of it.

Tom Erdman said...

There is a clarity of thought that comes from a 4 year-old that somehow gets lost as we age. Thanks for noticing.

Fragrant Liar said...

Ugh. I LOVE LOVE LOVE all the comments. It's what I live for . . . but it's so hard to answer all of them!

Isn't Miss America the sweetest thing?