May 5, 2009

Thunderbox Road

Happy Cinco de Mayo, America! Ay! Ay! Arriba!

What better way to celebrate Cinco de Mayo than to entertain ourselves with the latest in colorful Texas architecture, affectionately known around these here parts as the Thunderbox.

In Texas, we take our crappers seriously. It's probably the biggest reason some Texans think we should secede from the union and become our own country -- when you spew a big enough load of shit, you really need an additional place to put it all, along with a hefty dose of isolation. But seriously, you can find more info about the Thunderbox Road project and the talented artists who made them by visiting this website: http://www.thunderboxroad.com/index.html.

So without further a-doo-doo, here's a parade of our state treasures.



This little beauty was built by Ben Beckendorf. I think it boldly goes where just a few people have gone before and captures the harmonious spirit of Austin, the live music capital of the country. Hang up yer hat, Bubba, it's time to do yer doody.

(click on the images for bigger, more detailed views)





This Thunderbox was by Gwendolyn Listerman. I feel certain she has captured the majestic beauty of Texas' ranch life with these wild horses. The secret message underlying this project is not lost on me, though. When one has to go, one has to GO, and one will frequently proceed at a full gallop to get to the Excrete Seat.





This gem was made by the dynamic duo of Betty Rhodes and Greg Glowka. I think they did a fine job of illustrating farm life in Texas. Ya got yer billy goat and ya got yer rooster, and naturally, they all git along jes' fine. And since they poop everywhere you can step, they should not be at all bothered by what you do inside that kaboom box.





To enhance the meaning of coyotes howling at the moon, Tami and Charles Kegley, give us a giggle with the mental imagery of Moonin' on the Range (sing it with me now, Mo-o-o-o-n, mo-o-o-n on the ra-ange, where the deer and the antelope play. . . ). No coyotes allowed inside, though. We don't want any animals hurt in the usage of this facility.






Dotti Brundrett is probably tired of Texas rednecks, so I'm guessing she put her realistic aquarium powers to good use with the fish tank theme. Masterfully done, too, you ask me. I believe the meaning behind Dotti's choice tells us that once you're inside and doing your bidness, you will need to hold your nose or asphyxiate yourself. Really, clothespin the schnoz, folks, cuz Texas has a bad enough rep, what with that revolving door on Death Row thang.





Every man - and woman - really does need a throne. David Querbach has fashioned just the right thunderbox for ye royal highney. Go in style in a perfectly appointed mini-castle, and you'll feel like a king or a queen (or both - hey, I'm not judging - this is Austin).






Last but not least, Ken and Donna Malson really got their hands dirty with this one. Notice the intricate detailing in bas relief on the outside of the box. Their strategy was probably to make it so their customers paid more attention to their design than to what was going on down under. Of course, that's assuming there's some detailing inside -- we already know there will be some relief.



There you have it! A fun treasury of Thunderboxes from Texas. I don't ever want to hear you say I didn't share my crap with you.

Whew! I feel better!
.

35 comments:

Andrea said...

Man, what beautiful crappers they are! I want one for my backyard!

Roshni said...

I need to order one of those for my backyard someday... it can replace the ugly gnome

Expat From Hell said...

Great post. Love the artwork. Pure Texas. Now, you can come to Dallas and see the $1 Billion Crapper that Jerry built in Arlington. The 'boys are bulking up as we speak.

EFH

darsden said...

Wow, the beauty on the outside sure helps hide the ugly on inside ;-) What a cool idea to an oldie leave it to those Texans to put a spin on them. My family lived in Plano for 15 years, I still have friends in Fort Worth :-)

Unknown said...

Great post!! I favor the stampeding horses one by Listerman, but I'd take any one of them there pieces of art for my backyard!

Anonymous said...

Oh my... now aren't those just special. But peee yew.

Di
The Blue Ridge Gal

lisahgolden said...

As long as they are free of the obligatory wasp nest in the corner up top, I don't care what it looks like on the outside.

I lie. I want the mini castle.

Nancy said...

These are great. But did they need nose plugs while painting?

Jan said...

I'm in awe of your pun-ny goodness.

I think the "castle" one is my favorite.

Alicia @ boylerpf said...

I have never heard them referred to as thunderboxes! What next?!?!? You can tell I;m not from Texas...now a crapper I can relate to!

Tom Erdman said...

Where's the one from Slumdog Millionaire??

Anonymous said...

I got an email with these photos in it the other day and love them! Looks like something my sister would have in her pasture.

Amy said...

Ahhhh. Makes me so proud to have been a Texan.

A Joyful Chaos said...

Thunderboxes..... what a great way to describe them!

Wunderwoman said...

I've never heard them referred to as Thunderboxes either, but how fitting.

Debra Lynn Shelton said...

Wow, we native New Yorkers had no idea that outhouses still existed, much less could be such incredible works of art! Although I'm a musician and would normally lean in the direction of the guitar commode, I'm going to have to throw my TP hat in the direction of the wet and wonderful aquarium motif. Just thinking about it makes me want to, oh, well, never mind...

Carma Sez said...

thank you for sharing those fine crappers with us :D I am a connoisseur of art and crappers and those two go together so well in this post!

♥ Braja said...

Works of art. To crap in. Amazing...
:))
xx

MVD said...

I hung on every word of this craptastic post, yet was perturbed that your own thunderbox wasn't pictured. Unless you're still relying on potted plants and large jars.

The Wife O Riley said...

Man, I'm jealous!!! All we had were cows!

Smart Mouth Broad said...

WOW! Somebody needs to market this artistic "crap" to the Johnny on the Spot people.

Fragrant Liar said...

Yes, craptastic. Who knew an outhouse was a potential work of art? I wouldn't be surprised if one of these days a "thunderbox" was sold at auction for a mil or so. Seriously...

Anonymous said...

There's a load of crap in this post......literally. :)

Michelle Wells Grant said...

When the economy's in the toilet, we need funny shit like this. Thanks for keeping us so entertained, Ms. Fragrant Liar. And can I just say here .. I loved the weiner races blog too. I must take my darling Rosemary there next year (she's MY weiner dog!)

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

I was going to say something about them being works of art, but Braja got to my joke before I did....Dang!

Midlife Roadtripper said...

"when you spew a big enough load of shit, you really need an additional place to put it all,"

HaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa!


Outhouses up north were just that - houses in the out. Perhaps a sliver of moon or a sun carved in the side. These are much more inviting, even at night.

Bagman and Butler said...

One of the best art exhibits ever! They should take this exhibit on the road. I think it belongs in the Museum of Modern ARt in New York!

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Great outhouses. True artwork. I'd put any one of those smack dab in my living room so that my visitors could come over and ooh and aah over it.

Anonymous said...

As nice as they look from the outside...they all smell the same on the inside.

Madame DeFarge said...

I'm not sure that I'd want people to be staring at the Thunderbox when I was inside it. I'd get nervous bladder syndrome.

Justine said...

Wow, those are the nicest outdoor crappers I've ever seen. Are these displayed somewhere special, or just in the "artists" (ahem) yard?

I cracked up with your "without further a doo doo".

Justine :o )

TheHurt said...

Those are so cool! The closest to those I've got is when my flatmate decided to make a wall of porn into our (inside)toilet.. It started out as 1 wall. Soon, you couldn't see the tiling from the boobs and fanny. Yeah, I LOVED living with boys! :D

xx

Lori said...

Look at those pretty crappers. I've had to use those enough to know that they stink and will go out of my way to not have to use one...at least these look pretty.

Anonymous said...

Hilarious!

Girl Tornado said...

And my sister thought if we painted our outhouse a bright color it would stand out... I think I've just gotten much better ideas from your post!! :)